Change is inevitable, and coping with it can be a challenge, especially for children, who rely on routine for a sense of stability. Case in point: the leap from the end of school into summer, and then back to school weeks later.

“In a short period of time, kids go from a predictable physical environment and familiar schedule to the less-structured time of summer, then back to a new classroom, maybe even a new school,” says child and adolescent psychologist Becky Lois, PhD, of Hassenfeld Children’s Hospital at NYU Langone. “It can be very stressful for a child to navigate.”

The good news is that parents and caregivers can help kids navigate these seasonal transitions and build lifelong resilience. We asked Dr. Lois and pediatric clinical psychologist Katya Viswanadhan, PsyD, to share some tips.

Acknowledge the Anxiety

Parents may have a natural tendency to put a positive spin on typical anxieties, including transitions. But telling children “It will be great,” without acknowledging their normal jitters, can backfire.

“Unfortunately, we can’t wish a positive experience for our kids into existence,” explains Dr. Viswanadhan. “We need to show them how to tolerate difficult emotions and experiences.”

Start by acknowledging that nerves are completely normal, and that new situations are stressful for parents too. Making space for common, complex emotions can be reassuring to children.

That doesn’t mean you need to skew the conversation in a negative direction, however. Instead, “make space for two emotions: the anxiety of starting fresh and the hope that your child will have a positive experience,” adds Dr. Viswanadhan.

Ask Questions (Often)

Checking in with your child is always a good idea, particularly if they exhibit outward signs of anxiety or depression, such as sleep or diet changes, moodiness, or undesired behaviors.

Rather than assume how your child is feeling, ask open-ended questions, such as “I imagine this time of year is hard. How has it been for you?” You can also ask specifically about their feelings leading up to the start of school.

“While your child may not be ready to discuss their feelings in that moment, you’ve planted a seed and signaled that you are available to help them cope with their feelings when they’re ready,” explains Dr. Lois.

Lean into Routine

Though summer offers looser schedules, consistency around day-to-day habits can help reduce anxieties. Try to maintain predictable eating and sleeping schedules, and balance structured time with the freedom of play.

“You can be clear with your child about the ‘nonnegotiables,’ the guardrails around healthy habits,” says Dr. Viswanadhan, “while also protecting free time for your child’s preferred activities.”

Ask your child to name a goal or two for the summer break. From there, it will be easier to define a schedule that allows time for fun—without the day becoming a free-for-all.

It’s best not to loosen guidelines around things like sleep and screen time to an extreme. “It may make the transition back to school that much harder,” Dr. Viswanadhan adds.

Make Reasonable Accommodations

If your child becomes increasingly anxious as September approaches—especially if anxiety affects their eating, sleeping, or mood—consider supportive strategies. Small actions throughout the summer and on the first day of new activities or school can better equip your child to cope.

Accommodations should emphasize approaching, rather than avoiding, the anxiety.

For example, if your child is headed to a new school building, ask for a tour. Or ask your child to pack their schoolbag before the first day and walk through the morning routine as a “dress rehearsal.”

Of course, if transitional anxieties begin to interfere with your child’s daily activities or their ability to adapt to new situations, it may be time to call in help. Your pediatrician is a good place to start when seeking support; they can offer guidance about whether seeing a child psychologist may be helpful. In addition, experts at our Child Study Center, part of Hassenfeld Children’s Hospital, provide child and family support services and resilience programs to help your child manage anxiety.

Your child’s school counselor is another ready resource during the school year. “It can help your child to know there is a ‘safe’ person at school who understands their worries,” says Dr. Lois. You can connect with the counselor in advance of the school year to discuss a transition plan, if that might be helpful for your child. “That can keep routine anxieties from snowballing into school avoidance and set your child on the right course for a successful year.”